Valuing what is rare
Posted by Arnessa on September 10, 1997 at 21:14:24:
In response to Reserve, written by Hil on September 10, 1997 at 17:46:28
] Thats interesting its so marked. I guess it also underlines the idea that there is no one really 'correct' emotional response, either, maybe only a range of 'appropriate' ones. It does interest me that the English reserve is so attractive to some exhuberant Americans. Is it an unease with some of the over-the-top aspects their own culture? Not that I don't find it attractive sometimes myself.
Yes, I think that's exactly it, Hil. As an American, I am so often confronted with the emotional outpourings of others (in real life and as if that's not enough on TV too!) that it is a little refreshing to see that stiff upper lip. The notion that you just don't unburden yourself to any person at any moment can be a good one. Of course, there are drawbacks, serious ones, to not feeling free to express emotions. But on the whole, I think I'd wish the pendulum would swing a bit the other way in America. But apparently, it's not going to. And even worse, other countries seem to be emulating us!
The biggest problem, I think, is that once you start waving out a banner of emotions, the next person feels like he has to have a BIGGER banner to show that he really cares, and on and on, until your reactions to events aren't at all related to your real feelings but instead to the reactions of others.
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