Directions to servants.
Posted by Bob Whitworth on August 11, 1998 at 21:00:37:
In response to Servants, written by John W on August 10, 1998 at 05:51:24
As long as we're on the subject of servants, I thought I'd pass on these tidbits from Rev. Jonathan Swift's "Directions to Servants".
When your master or lady calls a servant by name, if that servant be not in the way, none of you are to answer, for then there will be no end of your drudgery: and masters themselves allow, that if a servant comes when he is called, it is sufficient.
When you have done a fault, be always pert and insolent, and behave yourself as if you were the injured person; this will immediately put your master or lady off their mettle.
If you see your master wronged by any of your fellow-servants, be sure to conceal it for fear of being called a tell-tale: however, there is one exception in case of a favourite servant, who is justly hated by the whole family; who therefore are bound in prudence to lay all the faults they can upon the favourite.
The cook, the butler, the groom, the marketman, and every other servant who is concerned in the expenses of the family, should act as if his master's whole estate ought to be applied to that servant's particular business. For instance, if the cook computes his master's estate to be a thousand pounds a year, he reasonably concludes that a thousand pounds a year will afford meat enough, and therefore he need not be sparing; the butler makes the same judgement; so may the groom and the coachman: and thus every branch of expense will be filled to your master's honour.
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