These lessons are of course, tongue in cheek. (-;

If you expect great things in marriage for an exceptionally stupid son, you could get a daughter in law like Lucy.

If you trust your secrets to an exceptionally stupid sister, you can snare the exceptionally stupid son of an overbearing heartless mother.

If you insult a widow in mourning, her daughter will become your sister-in-law.

If you constantly laugh for no good reason, somebody in the house will end up with a putrid fever.

If you buy a husband, he’s going to fool around on you.

Selfishness is the road to riches.

Pay attention to the animals, you won’t be bothered with the concerns of mere mortals.

Beware of long lost cousins.

Near death experiences bring out the best in people.

Charm brings forgiveness much faster than character does.

Don’t run in the rain when you’re looking at dead leaves.

Toothpick cases are hazardous to your intelligence.

35 is NOT old!

You may come to regret your idleness.