I couldn't agree more. You have said this better than I could ever hope to.

I have begun to wonder if Henry Dashwood would even have been pleased with the original 3000 pounds John intended to give the girls. That would have brought their income to just 650 a year, no? Then John Dashwood ends up giving them nothing. Can you just imagine Henry Dashwood turning in his grave?

I had thought to post contrasting Sir John Middleton's character to John Dashwood and this is the perfect place for it. Since you have already begun, I hope you don't mind my adding to it.

John Dashwood in chapter 2
He really pressed them, with some earnestness, to consider Norland as their home.

From Sir John's letter in Ch 4.
... true spirit of friendly accommodation. He understood that she was in need of a dwelling, and though the house he now offered her was merely a cottage, he assured her that everything should be done to it which she might think necessary, if the situation pleased her. He earnestly pressed her, after giving the particulars of the house and garden, to come with her daughters to Barton Park, the place of his own residence, from whence she might judge, herself, whether Barton Cottage, for the houses were in the same parish could by any alteration, be made comfortable to her.

and then in Ch. 7
In shewing kindness to his cousins, therefore, he had the real satisfaction of a good heart;

It's interesting to me that he probably would have taken them into his home for as long as necessary until the cottage could be comfortable for her.