GR Focus: Sister Relationships

“Why deny one's true nature or feelings to fit into society” (Mandy N)

How true! Mandy N’s entirely relevant information on C18th Romanticists greatly helped me to better understand Marianne’s behavior and treatment of others. (See link below.) Thanks Mandy N for kick-starting my mental processes this week.

They were three days on their journey, and Marianne's behaviour as they travelled was a happy specimen of what her future complaisance and companionableness to Mrs. Jennings might be expected to be. She sat in silence almost all the way, wrapt in her own meditations, and scarcely ever voluntarily speaking, except when any object of picturesque beauty within their view drew from her an exclamation of delight exclusively addressed to her sister. (Chapter 26)

Sensibility is a road paved with selfish intentions. (Mandy N)

Marianne accepts Mrs. J’s kind invitation purely for transport to Willoughby without any intention of paying her the appropriate attention or it seems even a little attention leaving Elinor to make it right. However I have come to think that is not quite right or fair to Marianne. (:D) She is indeed selfish, insensitive to the feelings of others, and blind to how her actions affect those people but surely Marianne does not see herself as forcing a burden on Elinor. The philosophy of “Why deny one’s true nature or feelings to fit into society” must also apply to her sister. From Marianne’s point of view Elinor has a choice and she chooses to bow to society’s wishes of grateful good manners and attention to Mrs. J. I also feel that Marianne probably does not care if it is made right with Mrs. J and is lucky that Elinor does not resent the position that she is constantly put in though Marianne’s inattention.

Marianne's eagerness to be gone declared her dependance on finding him there; and Elinor was resolved not only upon gaining every new light as to his character which her own observation or the intelligence of others could give her, but likewise upon watching his behaviour to her sister with such zealous attention, as to ascertain what he was, and what he meant, before many meetings had taken place. Should the result of her observations be unfavourable, she was determined at all events to open the eyes of her sister; should it be otherwise, her exertions would be of a different nature -- she must then learn to avoid every selfish comparison, and banish every regret which might lessen her satisfaction in the happiness of Marianne. (Chapter 26)

Elinor is in search and rescue mode; she worries about Marianne constantly, even while attending Mrs. J her mind is on Marianne—I think Elinor is a little desperate for Marianne and Willoughby to be right for Marianne’s sake but for her own too. This reminds me of when Edward came to Barton and Marianne was able to overcome her grief somewhat to be happy for Elinor. I feel that Elinor also desires to do this; if she can be happy for Marianne then she should be able to bear her own unhappiness a little bit easier. Marianne is oblivious to Elinor’s true feelings and Elinor is unable to take the leap from observing their (Marianne & Willoughby) warm behavior and obvious attachment to considering them engaged.

"You are expecting a letter then?" said Elinor, unable to be longer silent.
"Yes, a little -- not much."
After a short pause, "You have no confidence in me, Marianne."
"Nay, Elinor, this reproach from you ! -- you who have confidence in no one!"
"Me!" returned Elinor in some confusion; "indeed, Marianne, I have nothing to tell."
"Nor I," answered Marianne with energy, "our situations then are alike. We have neither of us anything to tell; you, because you communicate, and I, because I conceal nothing." (Chapter 27)