Edward, in his interactions with Elinor, doesn't seem to have openly courted her (now we know the lock of hair is Lucy's and not Elinor).

We don't see much of Edward and Elinor's interactions at Norland, but they do not seem to be extravagant proofs of affection. Mrs Dashwood thinks his behaviour to be quiet, and Elinor is doubtful about what his intentions are towards her:
I am by no means assured of his regard for me. There are moments when the extent of it seems doubtful; and till his sentiments are fully known, you cannot wonder at my wishing to avoid any encouragement of my own partiality, by believing or calling it more than it is. In my heart I feel little -- scarcely any doubt of his preference. But there are other points to be considered besides his inclination. He is very far from being independent. What his mother really is we cannot know; but, from Fanny's occasional mention of her conduct and opinions, we have never been disposed to think her amiable; and I am very much mistaken if Edward is not himself aware that there would be many difficulties in his way, if he were to wish to marry a woman who had not either a great fortune or high rank."
...
...the longer they were together, the more doubtful seemed the nature of his regard; and sometimes, for a few painful minutes, she believed it to be no more than friendship. (chpt 4).

Meanwhile Willoughby calls Marianne by her Christian name, offers her the gift of a horse, etc.

Edward appears to have engaged the affection of Elinor by intelligent conversation, the expression of his eyes and the sweetness of his countenance - not by any planned or particular attentions. Perhaps he should have stayed away from Norland the moment he started caring for Elinor, but that's a vastly different mistake from Willoughby's undoubted series of attentions to Marianne.