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Not Only Does She Deserve Flowers...
Written by BarbaraB
(10/8/2006 9:49 p.m.)
in consequence of the missive, Flowers Sent to Lucy Steele, penned by James S.
1. Delicately bring up Mrs. Ferrars making sure you preface it with the fact that it will be an odd question because you know it is. This will allow you to be able to: 2. Explain why you brought the question up in the first place because all along this is your pupose---to reveal: "Hey you, I am engaged to Edward so hands off. The man is mine!" She will in all likelihood not want to believe it so: 3. Mention your Uncle Pratt as this will provide a basis for your acquaintance and give credence to the fact that you at least had the opportunity to get engaged. If Elinor's security is not yet sunk: 4. Extract a small miniature of dear Edward from your pocket saying, "To prevent the possibility of a mistake, be so good as to look at this face." Just in case Elinor is still doing her best to find a way for this to all not be true: 5. Produce a handkerchief and dab at your eyes and nose. Tears are ususally a clincher but if this doesn't quite do the trick: 6. Carelessly pull a letter from your pocket (obviously it is important to wear an outfit with large pockets). Off-handedly make sure Elinor gets a glimpse of the direction to yourself. This will be the final proof. Further denial will be impossible. Be sure you carry all this out with significant pauses and allow for moments of illuminating silence so Elinor can have time to absorb all the mounting evidence. Fill in with additional details to plug up any possible loopholes. Get in a few surreptitious side glances/peeks to gage your effectiveness as you go. Don't forget, somewhere in all of this, to make sure Elinor swears an oath of secrecy. Thus you will have gently led Elinor down the yellow brick road to discover the Wizard of Oz is a fake but... A stellar performance, so, yes indeed, have several dozen roses delivered to Lucy backstage after she makes her acceptance speech. I agree, she deserves them! (I am so laughing out loud and I so do not like Lucy but I enjoyed your post. I can tell you took such great delight in writing it and I took delight in reading it. There was a lot to think about that I had not considered before.) Thanks. :) |

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