The difficulty with this line of argument is that in saying Elizabeth is wrong to judge Charlotte by Elizabeth's standards, you are judging Elizabeth by your standards. Elizabeth clearly has no problems with holding Charlotte to Elizabeth's standards, why do you not accord Elizabeth the courtesy you think she should accord Charlotte?

As for who should make judgments about whether someone will make a good father - three things in reply:
1. Anyone who has a brain has a right to make whatever judgment they want. After all, it's not possible to stop them. Even if I wanted to, I have no idea how I could stop thinking that Mr Collins will make a bad father. It would be like setting out to believe that the Sydney bridge doesn't actually exist. Every time I read P&P I am confronted by evidence that Mr Collins is stupid, self-centered, and objects to novel reading. Every time I go to Sydney I see the harbour bridge.

2. I agree that many factors go into shaping a child, I hardly think that that is reason to give up on the factors you can control - such as who the father is. When I go tramping (hiking) I risk many dangers, so I do my best to reduce them by attending training sessions, (outdoor first aid, river crossing, etc) by carrying emergency equipment, by studying the weather and adjusting my route in response, and by etc. Your line of argument implies that since none of this guarantees keeping me safe, I should just forget about it all. By my thinking, just because I can't eliminate the risks is no reason not to reduce them. Oh, and I think that people who go tramping without emergency equipment and experience/training and who ignore the weather and so forth are wrong in doing so, I am not making a personal statement about myself, I am making a claim about what universal standards should be.

I also think that Mr Bennet should not have married Mrs Bennet, not just because she makes him rather unhappy (and he her), but also because she appears to not be a good mother - and she certainly doesn't offset Mr Bennet's faults as a father.