that he is caught by her intelligence and spirit, both of which find expression in the eyes. She, on the other hand, was "perfectly unaware; to her he was only the man who made himself agreeable nowhere, and who had not thought her handsome enough to dance with."

No, I truly don't think we can lay the blame for Darcy's distress at Elizabeth's door, or that she was unconsciously attracted to him in any way. If anything, quite the opposite - I think Darcy may be struck by the contrast between fawning Caroline (and presumably others who are more impressed by his pocketbook than himself) and Lizzy who, in today's terms, "doesn't even know he exists." Being ignored by an attractive woman is something of a novelty to him, he is used to being the one doing the ignoring.