Regarding the music, I think Lady R, unlike Anne, Lady Elliot and Frederick, was not really musical. Probably she kindly encouraged and praised Anne, but the musical Anne knew that it was not with "any just appreciation or real taste." Mr and Mrs Musgrove warmly and fondly praised their daughters' music, and also politely and gratefully praised Anne when she played for the girls to dance -- but they know nothing about music.

I agree that Lady R should have taken Anne on trips to other places -- she took Anne once to Bath, Anne disliked Bath and I believe refused to accompany her there again. So Lady R should have thought of taking a trip somewhere else for once, especially when she failed to get Anne included in Sir W's trips to London. A trip to the seaside would have done Anne good.

Regarding appearances -- JA's most popular heroine, Elizabeth Bennet of P&P, was also deceived by appearances in the manners of two young men -- one of whom has all the goodness, and the other all the appearance of it!