Is that he had not thought about it for eight years. The memory was too painful, and if he ever did think of it, all he felt was his wounded pride and his anger. So he had pushed it down and, as we would say now, not dealt with it. If he had thought about it, as he says to Sophia, it has been in a very superficial way - skating over his real feelings. Being so out of touch with his feelings is the only explanation I can give for the way he behaves towards her at Upper Cross.

However, I think he had convinced himself that he has thought about it, and that he is free of her, even though he retains a memory of some of her qualities as the yardstick he measures women by. So in a way this is the mirror image of Anne's situation - they both still have the other as the standard by which they judge men/women. But while she is all too conscious of her love for him, and has dwelt on her feelings all that time, he has avoided examining his feelings and convinced himself that 'her power with him is gone'.