The big difference between our two protagonists is that Anne, though she's initially in doubt about what FW is feeling, knows what she herself is feeling: she's quite clear that she's still in love with him and always has been. But Wentworth, in addition to not knowing what Anne is feeling, doesn't even know what he's feeling himself: he's spent the past eight years convincing himself that she has no power over him even though, just incidentally, he's never met anyone else who's her equal. A lot of what he does -- hanging around Kellynch/Uppercross when he could go elsewhere, flirting under Anne's nose with the sweet but dim Musgrove girls rather than seeking entertainment elsewhere, returning over and over to conversational themes that are significant in the context of his relationship with Anne (the year six, firmness of character, etc.), behaving to her with a cold politeness that's quite out of character yet simultaneously being completely tuned it to her needs (for rescue from little Walter, for the carriage ride) -- reads to me like the behavior of a man who is trying to talk himself into one set of feelings while subconsciously being motivated by an entirely different set.