Sorry, your post made me think of the Pirates of Penzance. ;-)

Interesting that the second daughter of a baronet should feel all the responsibility of her position as keenly as Fanny Price feels the duty involved in being a fostered poor relation. They both get their greatest pleasure and reason for existence by serving and being of use. If they cannot serve the one they love best in an active role, they force themselves to fade into the background and serve them by "letting go".