As Anne's god-mother and practically her second mother, I think JA and her contemporaries would have thought that LR had a perfect right to give her advice, even unsolicited, on this occasion, especially when Anne was still so young. Also, remember that the era of arranged marriages where the elders decided these things was not so far in the past. But Elliot, thanks for pointing out that the second time around LR *waited* for Anne to come to her, which makes it sound as though she was tactful the first time, too. I hadn't noticed that!