Charlotte's thoughts: in her opinion it admitted not of a doubt, that all her friend's dislike would vanish, if she could suppose him to be in her power. The language here sounds mercenary to me, or at least like Lizzy's goal is to "secure" the best husband she can get. It doesn't sound like Charlotte is expecting Lizzy to fall in love with him out of gratitude for his affection.

We actually agree on some of your other points, so maybe I was not clear. We discussed the "wilfull misunderstanding" scene earlier. I was originally going to mention again the 2 instances you brought up. What stopped me were Darcy's words great enjoyment. I think the poetry conversation was a coverup for her mother's ill manners, and Darcy would have realized this. Arguing in favor of Bingley was, I think, done seriously, though not completely sincerely. In neither case did I feel she was laughing at others' "follies and nonsense," which is more what I think Darcy was illuding to here--her arch comments that were half-truths.

You're right that Lizzy was distressed by the inference she may be staying at Rosings, but perhaps no more so than if she had understood Mr. Darcy's real meaning and she did not have such prejudice against him. She probably seemed embarassed. This would not necessarily be discouraging, though it may not not have been so encouraging a sign as I was interpreting it in my post.