Thanks Tom for putting that so well- scramble into maturity and towards self assurance.

I personally think that the realization that Edmund was not so wise as she thought was the catalyst for her to begin to trust herself. She was not static. She did grow throughout the novel.

For me, being timid and shy are just personality traits, as is being an outgoing and witty- not necessarily indicative of good of bad character.

Rachel, I would just like to add to what Tom said.
Hyper-sensitive (1) I think as she grew she did begin to see the injustice in her situation and treatment. If you go back to Robbin's post "Admiring Fanny", I think there are good examples. As to specific charges of selfishness and ingratitude, I think mostly you're referring to the Sir Thomas incident? While she was broken down and crying, she still had that knowledge that she was right. She did not protest inwardly because she knew Sir Thomas didn't know the whole truth. But she did know she was right and she carried that with her, even to the end where she knew she would be vindicated in Sir Thomas' eyes for refusing Mr. Crawford.

Hyper-sensitive (3)
I think Fanny's willingness to find fault with Mary is evidence that she is not perfect. She can feel jealousy just like anyone else. She is human, well fictionally human. :) However her assessment of Mary's character did turn out to be pretty much correct. It was not generous of her to think there was no possibility that Mary "could" change and adopt her husband's views.

As to Fanny's gratitude, I don't think she is ever improperly grateful if that makes any sense. What is galling is that Edmund could lecture her on gratitude.

I think I understand that it is bothersome that she is humble because nature and lack of nurture made her humble. So what is laudable in it? It's helpful maybe to consider what she could have been instead.

I'm going to quote from Janey's earlier posts "Fanny's Power" on this topic.
Definition of meek
1: enduring injury with patience and without resentment: Mild 1: gentle in nature or behavior
From http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/

and
"I think there's power in her nature, her meekness. She doesn't seethe with resentment or become bitter. That requires an internal power. Or maybe that develops internal power. She has persevered in the face of horrible circumstances and even in spite of her own obvious weaknesses. "

I think she could have turned out differently, but she didn't. :) (MP2 paraphrase for you Tom!) She could have harbored resentment and tried to get back at her oppressors, in any number of ways.

Even Mrs. Norris (granted her personality is different)- look at all she had to be grateful for. And what does she do? She takes advantage in every way she can, down to stealing green baize from the family that did so much for her. No doubt she deserved it for all she did for the inhabitants of Mansfield Park. ;)