I can understand Emma's attitude, having had her fill of Jane, Jane, Jane from Miss Bates, because I've started feeling the same about Miss Bates from Mr Knightley. :-D

>Actually Emma has been neglectful in contributing food:

I know that Mr Knightley says that but he ignores a lot what Emma does, just becase it's not what he has in mind. He should know that Mrs and Miss Bates are invited regularly to Hartfield and they are always entertained with a table well laid out.

the supper-table, which always closed such parties,
and.....
Emma allowed her father to talk -- but supplied her visitors in a much more satisfactory style;

Her thoughtfulness in seeing that both Mrs Bates and Mrs Goddard were well fed before she left for Coles' dinner, because in her absence Mr Woodhouse might prevent them from eating well;

before she left the house, was to pay her respects to them as they sat together after dinner; [........] by helping them to large slices of cake and full glasses of wine,

At least she was there when they had dinner, and saw they ate well.

In her absence, when at Crown Inn they were not so lucky;
The baked apples and biscuits, excellent in their way, you know; but there was a delicate fricassee of sweetbread and some asparagus[....]Now there is nothing grandmamma loves better than sweetbread and asparagus -- so she was rather disappointed,

Such card parties must have been quite often. And the above example shows that the food was good. A better way to offer food I must say.
Not that she shouldn't send anything because of this, but this situation has not to be overlooked IMO.

I've not come across Mr Knightley appreciating Emma's efforts with the 'real' poor.
His sympathies are all for Miss Bates and for her having sunk. Which means she isn't where Mrs Elton is, ....but she's also not where the 'real' poor cottagers are who Emma visits, and who are;

..sure of relief from her personal attention and kindness, her counsel and her patience, as from her purse.

I'm also reminded of the child hurrying to Hartfield for some broth.

Mr Knightley is more concerned with the loss of 'level' here than in poverty itself IMO.

Miss Bates has a fire at home, while Emma is consciuos;
....of what the poor must suffer in winter,

Of course she made this statement to distract Harriet from her thoughts, but that doesn't mean Emma doesn't think about this subject, and do something to relieve it.

To be fair, Miss Bates herself counts her blessings,...... it's just Mr Knightley!!!!!

Has he ever been inside the poor cottages? Miss Bates lives in a house where the elite of Highbury all fitted in together on quite a few occassions.

IMO this disparity that Emma sees between the poor cottagers and Miss Bates doesn't register what Mr Knightley wants to emphasise.