in the comparison with Darcy and Bingley -- I feel much more pity for Harriet than I do for Bingley.

Bingley is a 23 year old man of independent fortune, his own master, a man of some information and intelligence. As a man, it was he who had openly paid attentions to Jane, who might not have given him much encouragement, but had "accepted his attentions with pleasure", as even Darcy admitted.

Harriet is a dependent, simple minded 17 year old girl who is accustomed to doing what others told her to. She had previously been content to accept anything that Mrs Goddard told her, and now is under Emma's influence and Emma is more wily and more determined than Mrs Goddard, I think poor Harriet is wax in Emma's hands. And Harriet telling Emma that her rejection would surprise Mrs Goddard and Miss Nash is her timid, confused way of half-questioning Emma's judgment -- before Emma, she would have consulted Mrs G, who would have advised her to accept RM, but Emma is unmoved by Harriet's mention of what Mrs G would have said.